Do you think it’s selfish to put yourself first? Depending on the context, it can be selfish to think of yourself and not others. For example, if a pie is cut into eight equal pieces and there are eight hungry people in the room, it would be selfish of you to take two pieces. However, it is often important to put yourself first. You have a lot of energy to give, but you must save some of that energy for yourself. You came into this world alone and you’ll leave on your own. Your longest relationship in life is with yourself. Only when you manage this relationship well can you manage your relationship with others. Dating yourself is one of the most important things you can do for your mind and for self-care, and it can help boost confidence, self-love, and acceptance. Dating yourself can be both literal and figurative, but both methods let you worship yourself like the goddess that you are!
Be Kind To Yourself
We wouldn’t typically treat our brothers or colleagues unkindly. Yet, we sometimes talk meanly or critically to ourselves without a second thought.
That inner critic that chastises you for your mistakes decreases your sense of motivation at the same time. Persistent negative views of yourself may even instil feelings of helplessness.
Negative self-talk can be toxic. It’s best to neutralize this voice, challenge it, or treat yourself in the first place as you would your bestie. Treat yourself with self-compassion as you are a human being doing the best you can.
For A Better Self-Love And Confidence
Loving yourself unconditionally and accepting your flaws is a powerful act of self-care. As you invest your time and energy in self-dating, you prioritize self-love and nurture your relationship with yourself. Engaging in activities that bring you joy, forming self-care routines and embracing your unique qualities all contribute to confidence.
Freedom
When you take a date night for yourself, the first benefit is the freedom to do whatever you want to do! You don’t have to make concessions for anyone else. It feels good to simply let a day or night, now and again, be all about you and your tastes. It reminds you of who you are, what you love, and that you can, in fact, feel fantastic all on your own.
Solitude
Get over your fear of being alone. The more you practice entertaining, nurturing and dating yourself, the you learn more about what you want in a partner. If you’re in a relationship, it’s important to reconnect with yourself and give yourself all the details you feel you’re missing in your partner. It’s about being whole unto yourself. You are more attractive when you’re okay with being alone. When you are by yourself you are with yourself.
Know Your Worth
When you’re dating someone else, whether it’s a friend or potential partner, the quality time you spend with them, helps you get to know them and their worth better. And when they’re good enough, they also feel more worthy of being in your life and the investment of time and energy in them. It’s the exact same with yourself and your self-dates. Spending this quality alone time, especially on dates, helps you get to know yourself better. Thus learning how to appreciate yourself and your worth in the following ways:
- Appreciate and love yourself as a person, and who you are, and know that you’re worthy of your own love and affection.
- Recognise how amazing you are, and all of your positive and unique attributes and values.
- Understand and believe that you are a good person, and you deserve good people in your life. You deserve to be loved and you shouldn’t settle for less.
Radiating Your Worth To The World
When you take the time to know your worth, and really believe that you are worthy and that you’re a loveable person… You also radiate it outside to the world and people around you. Knowing your worth helps you be more confident in who you are and helps you hold yourself higher. Which is something that can be seen and felt from the outside, by other people. And again, knowing your worth requires you to not only spend quality time with yourself but also date yourself as part of it. The following are the main ways your worth radiates from the inside out:
- Knowing your worth prevents you from settling for just anyone, and you won’t give the time of day to just anyone who gives you theirs. You won’t hesitate to be picky with who you allow in your life.
- People will recognise your non-bullshit mindset as a result of your self-worth, and know not to mess with you. This will filter out all of the negative, toxic people who will only harm you.
- You’ll also attract better people into your life, who will enhance the quality and frequency. Because positive vibes attract other positive vibes. And people will want to be around you more.
Investing In Yourself
Dating yourself, as with anyone else you date, is an investment. Of time, money and energy. When the person is worthy, so is the investment. You’re always worth the investment in yourself, and doing so helps you believe in that. As well as being the person who is even more worthy in your eyes. And again, when you invest in yourself, you radiate out to the world that you’re worth the investment. Thus you’ll attract better people who will also invest in you, and see how best to do so. An investment means you’re enhancing the quality and value of something. You’re taking a chance on yourself, and getting a profit in return. Self-dates make you a better self and provide you with a stronger self-relationship.
Prevents You From Settling
Once you’ve learned your worth and know that you’re worthy of the investment and good treatment, you’ll also refuse to settle for anyone who goes against all that. You’ll not only know your value and that you deserve so much better. But you’ll also be good and strong enough on your own, and by yourself that you won’t feel the need to just fill space with anyone you can find. You won’t be willing to accept just anyone into your life just for the sake of filling it. Nor will you lower your standard for anyone.
You will appreciate yourself and your alone time enough to not just give it up for anyone. And you’ll be picky with who you give your time to. No one will have a free pass in your life and be able to cross your boundaries as they see fit. And you won’t be willing to make exceptions for anyone.
Solo Date Ideas
Are you ready to start dating yourself? Here are some fun ideas for you to initiate dating yourself:
- Head to a coffee shop
- Buy yourself flowers
- Get a manicure
- Cook yourself dinner
- Go for a drive
- Treat yourself to dinner out
- Bake a cake
- Take yourself to a fancy restaurant
- Coffee and a book
- Watch your favourite movie or series
- Visit a museum
- Book a yoga and fitness class
- Do a solo spa day
- Create a vision board filled with your dreams and aspirations.
- Take yourself out for a solo movie date
- Have a solo dance party in your living room.
- Learn a musical instrument.
- Start writing a journal
Other people enjoy your company, right? So why shouldn’t you? As Buddha once said,
“You can search throughout the entire universe for someone who is more deserving of your love and affection than you are yourself, and that person is not to be found anywhere. You yourself, as much as anybody in the entire universe deserve your love and affection.” Taking yourself on a date is one way for you to love yourself, So start loving yourself.